EMBRACING SADNESS IS NEVER A GOOD IDEA


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bellamy young is a treasure

i am doing worse than i have been in years. actual years. like, i can’t think about it for too long because it is staggering to think about and i might cry and it’s better if i don’t cry when i can because there are lows that i protect myself from by feeling as little as possible

it would be so much better if i didn’t have to exist

i’m fucking tired for someone who is almost always in bed

i didn’t have the energy to care about myself when i had my life, i was already depressed. i am almost always depressed. i have a broken brain. it doesn’t work properly.

I’m cold and i’m going inside

they had almond milk still at the bakery so remember, life only shits on you like 98% of the time, there will be those little ‘up’ moments

yousaytheydontcare:

gonna try and get coffee now it’s nearly 7 and i’m still terrified i haven’t waited long enough

lol i’m scared i’m going to cry regardless just out of fear and nervousness even though it’s been hours and like, it literally couldn’t matter anymore

i have to just get up and leave and i’m stuck

i hate my brain/life/etc.

(Source: goldenstories)

gonna try and get coffee now it’s nearly 7 and i’m still terrified i haven’t waited long enough

it’s weird that i now think of all emotions as bad, because i don’t remember what good ones are like most of the time

knitting and crying

an interesting hybrid of the kinds of days i’ve been having

scrapes:

meet Sosa. he is an adorable, caring, sweet, playful kitty, and coming from a self-proclaimed dog lover, this is saying a lot! i’ve never wanted a cat before, but needless to say i fell in love with this baby.

my boyfriend’s cat had him and four other kittens, and now the only problem is that him and his sister, Sansa, need a home! i’ve decided to take Sosa in permanently and keep Sansa while I try to find her a home, (even though i’m dreadfully allergic) but unless I get all of the cat supplies myself, my mom won’t let me keep them. that’s where you ~generous~ cat lovers come in.

I put together an Amazon wishlist with basic cat supplies on it to get all the help I can get. if I don’t take them in soon, they will most likely be put down and I can’t stand to see that happen. one of their siblings were already put down and i feel sick thinking that will be their fate as well.

if you would like to donate any amount, perhaps smaller than the cost of the wishlist items, you can donate to my paypal at mia.pulgar@gmail.com. Every cent helps!

also, if you’re in the south florida broward/miami-dade area and would like to give a loving home for shy Sansa, please message me!

signal boost if you can’t donate :)

i can’t handle normal life

i’m incapable of handling normal life

i’ve lost so much and i don’t know if i ever had that capability but it’s definitely gone now

social anxiety + paranoia + self-loathing that while i can choose to not indulge it, never really leaves = useless to everything ever

Overwhelming Emotions

yousaytheydontcare:

"For some people emotional and physical pain feels more intense and occurs more frequently that it does for other people. Their distress come more quickly and is overwhelming. They cannot see the end of the pain and don’t know how to cope with the severity of their pain. The same factors may elicit overwhelming emotions in one person and not another. People with overwhelming emotions might not deal with their feeling in a healthy way, which makes sense: one is not necessarily able to think rationally or find a good solution when you feel overwhelmed."

Feeling Overwhelmed by Emotions & Caring for Yourself

i miss having phone service

i think it’s understandable and reasonable, the mental state i am in

i feel things very strongly but the base emotions themselves make perfect sense

i think ‘broken’ is a not an abnormal thing to feel

dream room/current self

dream room/current self

pillowfightinthemiddleofthenight:

do you think amy winehouse would like me if we went to the same heaven